In the Waiting Line of Your Life?

For those who wonder if they’ve missed their turn — and are ready to trust the wisdom of their own path.

“It’s your life—the path is wide open. No one else will live it, carry it, or understand it quite like you. You get to craft and curate a life that is true to your own existence.”

— Live Well Live Whole™

We’ve all felt it — standing in the waiting line of life, watching others being called forward. They seem to effortlessly step into love, family, success, abundance — while we shuffle forward, and circle, glancing at the clock, wondering when it will finally be our turn.

Have you ever felt that way?  Or am I just reflecting an isolated thought you’ve never experienced?  If you’ve never experienced this feeling, wonderful.  But those who have, indeed,  experienced the waiting line—where you felt it should be your turn, but it never arrived—read on.  This may be for you? 

What if the line was never meant to lead to their destination? What if your path, your blueprint, is not a carbon copy of theirs, but something uniquely your own?  How would you reframe your approach?  Or pose your questions? Position your life?

What We Control — and What We Don’t

We live with the illusion that we can control outcomes, timelines, and other people’s choices about us. But the truth is: we can only tend to what’s within reach — our own healing, our presence, our willingness to meet life as it is – on its terms. Waiting does not have to mean passivity. Sometimes it is preparation.

The Comparison Trap

We often want what we see of someone else’s life, convinced that what they have is what we should have. But we rarely see the cost of what they carry. The trade-offs they’ve made or the hidden sacrifices beneath the surface.  We rarely stop to ask if what they have actually brings them joy.  When we are focused on what is in someone else’s hand and not our own, we lose sight of our possibilities, potential and the power of our own presence. We diminish our value and give away the talents and treasures bestowed upon and within us to cultivate. 

Let me tell you about a typical experience— the woman sitting at the edge of the wedding reception. Her smile soft, but her hands fidgeting in her lap, uncomfortable, waiting as she watches couples dance, feeling that familiar ache: When will it be my turn? When will someone choose me. 

Later she sits in her car and whispers to herself: What’s wrong with me? Why do I keep getting passed over?

Not realizing her questions are actually the wrong questions. 

But what she doesn’t yet know is this: the friend she envies, the bride she thinks has it all, is full of doubt and dread even as she walks down the aisle. All of the moments of being gaslight, manipulated and diminished by her soon to be groom, flashed before her as she stood at the double doors of the cathedral, guests waiting to witness the high profile nuptials.  She had said yes after months of pressure, clinging to the idea of being chosen. Feeling that she probably wouldn’t get any better of an offer.  Before the wedding was even completed, behind closed doors, her marriage was already fraying. Secrets and toxic dynamics would soon surface — and she would find herself facing the possibility of annulment or divorce.

What we see is never the whole story. Everything — everything — has a cost. And not everything is worth the expense.

When we internalize certain experiences, particularly those associated with trauma wounds and responses, we can sink into a hijacked and distorted perception of ourselves and our lives.  We tend to see the absence and not what is present.  We slip into a negative abyss and an out of controlling spiraling way of thinking that is just not true.    

But if comparison dims your light and steals your peace, it may be time to come home to your own story. Focusing on your path, your truth, and the quiet call of your soul that creates the clarity and calm your life is longing for. The moment you release the weight and gravity of someone else's life, you begin to reclaim space for your own becoming. I'd like to believe that every soul arrives with its own internal map—a sacred guidance system, if you will. The more you try to walk someone else’s road, the farther you may stray from the one made just for you. Your real guidance? It’s already within you.

Your Blueprint is Within

You are not here to live someone else’s story. You’re here to write your own.  And as long as there is breath in your body, your story is still be written with the life you choose. Beneath the surface of your longing, ask yourself: What do I truly want?

Is it companionship? Safety? To feel seen? To repair a wound? Wealth? A house? A Career? Or is it simply to be chosen — so you can finally believe you are worthy?

You do not have to be chosen to be valid. You are already whole.  Choose yourself. 

There is a difference between healing the wounds of the past — giving yourself permission to have, to be, to do — and feeling the limited option to duplicate someone else’s experience. One comes from worthiness, the other from distortion. Honor and recognize your path. What is it you are positioned to bring forth?  Give life, intention and energy to that. 

There’s a quote often attributed to Oscar Wilde that says, “Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”

Once you reclaim your blueprint, you no longer need permission to begin. The next step may be a

straight stretch—or it may be sideways, inward, upward. It may even be entirely on your own… and walked alone. Trusting your path often means releasing the need to follow someone else's. It's not about duplicating or replicating—it’s about honoring what makes you feel inspired and alive. Realizing your blueprint is within doesn’t just change how you see yourself—it changes how you move through the world. Is it time for you to move differently? Independently? Freely? Curiously? Fearlessly?

Stepping Out of the Line

Through media we are often conditioned to esteem the greatness, celebrity, brilliance and genius of others.  It keeps us on the sidelines of life as if creation only has room for one.  We are taught to go after the path that’s already been blazed to replicate the success of others.  We hear it on the radio.  A song was successful.  It charted number one.  So now there are 30 songs released that sound indistinguishable from the other.  We see it in fashion.  In movies.  In celebrities.  The formula becomes apparent and others including corporations, industries and individuals begin the chase.  But within us maybe there’s something even more original that wants to come forth.  We fear cultivating it because there’s nothing appearing like it in popular culture.  Or we want the fame and the fortune instead of focusing on the creative expression. 

We chase fame and fortune thinking it will bring satisfaction, power and happiness.  But look around you.   What is your evidence that this is true?  Probably, more the Opposite.  Self-destruction and implosion happens to the rich, powerful and famous.  So this can’t be the answer.  Can money and wealth help us?  Absolutely. And when we don’t possess these attributes in life we certainly want the opportunity to see for ourselves.   

You can choose to step out of the line entirely — to stop measuring your life against others and participate in the quiet, sacred unfolding of your own.

Pause here. Breathe. Place a hand on your heart.

What if your solitude  or the space you’re in is not a punishment but an initiation or preparation? What if what’s yours is still on its way — or already here in ways you’ve overlooked? What if you are overlooking the bounty and benefits at your banquet table because you are busy being distracted by the gleam of someone else’s? 

“Don’t get lost in what is not yours.” — Rumi

A Gentle Invitation

What if you stepped out of the waiting line, just for today? Sat quietly and asked yourself:

• What is truly mine to want?

• What is truly mine to carry?

• What is truly mine to release?

• What is it I am positioned to bring forth?

Name the longing. Name the cost. Decide if it’s yours — or if it belongs to someone else’s story. 

Closing Blessing

You are not behind. You are not wrong. You are not forgotten. You are here — on time, on purpose, walking your own authentic path.

May you trust the quiet unfolding of your life.

May you feel at home in your own story.

May you remember that what is yours cannot miss you — and what is not yours can be released with grace and intention.

Take what you need from these words, and leave the rest. You are already enough, here and now.  

Journal Prompts: In the Waiting Line of Life

Here are some reflective journal prompts to accompany your reading of In the Waiting Line of Life. Take your time, breathe between each one, and let your answers come slowly.

🌿 1. When have I felt like I was waiting for my “turn” in life? What was I longing for in that moment?

🌿 2. Whose life do I often compare mine to? What parts of their story do I imagine — and what unseen costs might I not consider?

🌿 3. What do I believe “being chosen” would give me? How can I begin to choose myself today?

🌿 4. What is truly mine to want — not what I’ve been told to want, or what I’ve envied?

🌿 5. What costs am I willing — and unwilling — to pay for the things I long for?

🌿 6. Where might I still be trying to duplicate someone else’s experience? How can I honor my unique path instead?

🌿 7. What is it I am positioned to bring forth in this season of my life?

🌿 8. What small evidence of my own unfolding can I notice and celebrate today?

You don’t have to answer them all at once. Even one question, explored deeply, can open a door. May your words meet you with compassion and clarity.

Remember to Live Well. Live Whole  “Because this life is your one life to make your best life”.